Anger and Sadness

http://www.economist.com/world/international/displaystory.cfm?story_id=16219402&fsrc=scn/tw/te/rss/pe

There are a lot of factors named in there. What I'm going to talk about only gets passing mention.

I have heard it mentioned before and read it in the article now that evangelical "Christians" are going over to Africa and stirring up some of the hate against homosexuals and bisexuals we've been seeing recently. That not all of it comes from African cultural traditions. That some of it is being brought in by these evangelists, brought to a fury.

So this is what I have to say:

I'm sick of this shit.

I am sick and fucking tired of all this shit.

I know what is in the Old Testament. Truth to tell, there's not much - a prohibition against anal sex, buried in the midst of hundreds of other laws. But let's pretend for the moment that it has strong words against all homosexuality or some kind of shit.

I know what is in Paul's writings in the New Testament. Paul speaks against homosexuality, vaguely-defined sexual immorality, and blood drinking.

Truth be told, I don't know what to make of all that. I mean, sure, it's specific enough, but it's also included with other things I'd never think to follow, like restrictions on beard-trimming (Old Testament) and head covers for women (New Testament). Moreover, Paul's stuff is included with things that directly contradict Jesus's word in the Gospels. Furthermore, Jesus's stuff is meant to be "this is what you do with the Old Testament" and is considered to be its ultimate interpretation.

So. You know what Jesus said?

"Love your neighbor as yourself." "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind." "Love your enemies." "Let he who has not sinned cast the first stone."

He said that in the end of days, people would be divided - and he didn't say it would be divided between the gays and the straights, or the heathens and the Christians. He said it would be divided between those who helped the helpless and those who didn't. Between those who were kind and honored his words of love, and those who didn't.

That is the Word I follow. That is the Word I believe in. That Word is why I'm a Christian, no matter what doubts enter my heart, no matter how much the other books in the Bible confuse and sometimes anger me.

These people claim to follow my Lord. These people claim to follow the same Word I am following. And in the name of that Lord, that Word, they spread fear and hatred. They promote killing and rape.

In doing so, they deface the most sacred thing in my entire world.

I can deal with people being surprised that I'm a Christian because I'm not an asshole. I can deal with people saying horrible things about what I love and what I stand for. I can deal with people thinking that just by believing in what I do, I'm somehow judging them or looking down on them or thinking myself holier-than-thou. That's fine. Fact is, all I have to do about that is prove them wrong.

This isn't fine. This can never be fine. This isn't something I know how to stop. This fills me with so much sick horror, so much anger and sadness, that despite the number of words I can throw at it, there really are no words that are adequate.

To call my religion ugly names, to say horrible things of my Lord, to speak for Satan's glory or to deface every sacred symbol on the planet, all of these things are not what I call blasphemy.

Because this? This thing that these people are doing in the name of the Word I love so dearly? This is blasphemy.